1. He doesn't move. Mr. Cliff Lee is just so calm, cool and collected out there that he does not need to move, even if may help him get under the ball and make a more secure catch. He moves for no ball. The ball must come to Cliff Lee.
2. Joe Buck and Tim McCarver's amusement at this play. So what if the ball almost squirted out of his glove. I mean, it looked good, right? Lets all just laugh and marvel at the loose as a goose pitcher out there.
3. He definitely knew what he was doing. See how he's got the glove just waiting at his side? Guaranteed he's thinking "I'm gonna one hand this thing and make it look all nonchalant like I don't give a fuck. Woah! That was close. Ok, now give them a couple exaggerated chews of your gum. Nice."
4. The Gum. Are you fucking kidding me!? you have made an enemy for life with that fucking move, Lee. I hope it was chock full of sugar and you get cavities and they have to drill the shit out of your teeth and they run out of Novocain midway through.
5. The post catch transfer from glove to hand. Ugh. Not only did he have to go all hot dog on the catch, but lets just carelessly toss the ball from the glove into the hand. Cliff Lee does not deign to reach into his glove to pick up a measly baseball. That baseball has a one way, ejector seat, ticket from glove to hand.
583. The no-look. "How can I make this routine play seem even more beneath me than I already have? Refusal to move? Check. One-hand, off to the side catch? Check. Casual gum chewing? Check. I know I'm forgetting something critical here....Oh! No look. Look away from your glove as soon as it gets close. Wait for it, wait for it - look away! - aaaaand got it. Now, to top it off, just sort of look around, to let everyone know you weren't concerned. You're an animal, Cliff." The fucking Fonz started Game 1 for the Phillies.
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